“Give-It-To-Granny” Crypto Guide


Disclaimer: This article has been produced in a comical style, based on how I would imagine discussing cryptocurrencies with my Grandma (who passed away some years ago).

Hopefully, you will be able to gauge that all-important human connection, that is becoming vague in this digital world, and be able to relay the basics of cryptocurrency to your loved ones, through reading this. It is to be received in the entertaining spirit, as intended. Enjoy!

Another working week comes to a close and I arrive at crazy old Grandma’s house. She is sitting by the kitchen window as usual, smoking her customary Embassy cigarette. I walk into the house and almost instantly I begin to feel the heat. Yes, Grandma is somewhat of a cold-blooded creature, and can be found with the heating on full, under a blanket on the sofa, on a hot summer’s day!

Upon entering the kitchen, I can see Grandma getting comfy in her chair by the table, in the corner. She becomes posed for her usual inquisitive chitchat.

Bitcoin Grandma
Source: 99 Bitcoins

“So, how are you doing, son? Better than the weather I hope!” she asks.

“No too bad Grandma. I am enjoying getting into cryptocurrency.”

“Cryptocurrency? Isn’t that what the news reporter said was pile of crap?”

“It’s not, Grandma. Think of it as an efficient way of making transactions. It’ll save your legs from walking down to the bank branch for a start.”

“Cheeky bugger!” she said with a grin. “So, what is it, son?”

“Cryptocurrency is a digital form of currency. It could a store of value like digital gold, or a modern currency for the internet. No one really knows its full potential at the moment.”

“Sounds too complicated for me, son. I’m too old. I’ll stick to Facebook.”

“Funny that you should say that Grandma, Facebook are launching their own digital currency next year, called Libra. I guess it shows the way the world is heading.”

“I guess you are right, son.”

“Just think Grandma, you could be using a form of cryptocurrency next year without knowing it, if you are transacting on their platform.”

“So will Libra be another Bitcoin, son?”

“No, Grandma. Bitcoin is the number one cryptocurrency and is what people are looking to as digital gold. Libra isn’t really of interest to most people in cryptocurrency, as it is just a coin to use on the Facebook platform.”

“Oh well, it all sounds interesting, son. So how do I know which one is the right one?” as she sparks up another cigarette and shuffles over to the back door.

“There are thousands of cryptocurrencies, Grandma. Most are no good and will become obsolete. At this stage, most people are either trading them or investing in projects that they speculate can make a difference to people’s lives.”

“I still don’t get that I can’t see the cryptocurrency or touch it.”

“Think of it as a means of transferring value, Grandma, with all of the transactions held on a big ledger, called a blockchain. Each transaction has a unique and secure address made up from 16 characters (mixture of letters and numbers).”

“I guess this makes a little sense, son, though I still don’t get the part of not being physically being able to touch it”

“Again, think of it like as a means of storing or transferring value, Grandma. You can’t touch the gold that you own, and cryptocurrencies are as real as the money in your bank.” I move away from the back door as the wind blows the smoke back into the kitchen, as always!

“So, can I spend this down the corner shop to buy our morning newspaper?”

“Although it has come a long way in the last 10 or so years, we aren’t at that stage just yet.”

“How would I go about getting some of these cryptocurrencies then, son?” as she stumps out her cigarette and boils the kettle.

“Want a cup of tea, son?”

“Go on then, Grandma.” I reply. I have learned over the years with Grandma that it is quicker to just accept a cup, even if you don’t fancy one.

Bull Run
Image Courtesy of Matt Cimelli (Rapids Network)

I go on, “The simplest route for buying cryptocurrencies for most people is to use an online exchange or direct deposit.”

“Some cryptocurrencies are minable, where miners secure the network and process the coin’s transaction. Miners are rewarded with newly-created coins for by solving this computational problem.”

Grandma’s attention pricks up. “Miners you say?”

I quickly realise where this is going. “Not those types of miners, Grandma. Just forget I mentioned that part!”

Crypto Miners
Source: Fine Art America

“If I were to get myself some of these cryptocurrencies, where would I store them if I can’t see them?”

“There are a few options open, Grandma, however a hardware wallet is often the preferred method, as you are removing the option of hackers getting them through storing them online.”

“Don’t tell me that you were thinking of storing these under your mattress?” I cheekily added.

“Don’t think that you are too old for a clip around the lug hole, laddie!” replies Grandma in equally brazen fashion.

Grandma may be old, but she certainly hasn’t lost any of her wits, our comic conversations often end in a “Touché” type of fashion!

Deposit Accounts
Source: Deposit Accounts

“I’ve seen on the news that cryptocurrencies aren’t owned by anyone. So how does this work?”

Yes, they call this as being decentralised, Grandma. Basically, the network is like a living community, line our village. If everyone does their own little job, the community will prosper and grow.”

“I like the sound of that. Sounds like good old-fashioned values.”

“Yeah it does kind of Grandma, but you have to watch yourself. Like any place where there is value, there are people trying to corrupt or steal the system.”

“Bloody no good con-men, always out to ruin it for the rest of us!”

I quickly realise that I have to change the tone of the conversation to something more positive, before Grandma goes on one of her old-school rants.

“Anyway Grandma, from a technological standpoint they are thinking blockchain could change the world.”

“In what way, son?”

“Many ways Grandma. You’ve got projects looking to keep people’s online data secure, in healthcare industry it is being looked at securing and making accessing patient records with greater efficiency. Governments are starting to seek blockchain technology to assist with digitising people’s records, visas and travel documents, while helping businesses grow.”

“You can even get privacy coins Grandma, that make transactions untraceable and doesn’t require your personal information.”

“Nice to keep the nosey so-and-so’s out of the loop, for a change, son!” Grandma says with a smile.

“Go on then son, I’ll give it a go with £100. I think it sounds like an interesting investment, though I’ll need your help with it all?”

“Of course I don’t mind Grandma. What are Grandsons for?” I say with a cheeky smile.

Closing Statement by The Author

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About Strong Writers

Strong is a freelance cryptocurrency content writer, as well as a passionate contributor in Technical Analysis and Charting.

Honesty and integrity are paramount values to Strong, he continually helps cryptocurrency followers, both new and old, progress in this up and coming industry.

Strong is passionate about autism awareness and is a fitness enthusiast, also helping many people in both of these fields.

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